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Старый 17.11.2004, 16:25   #76 (permalink)

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here we go with... an essay!

Nowadays we use computers in schools so freaquent that some people believe there will be no need in teachers in the future.

freaquent -> frequent Nice word, though.

It all began about 40 years ago. People had had a dream of having assistants in routine day-to-day work and had came up with a computer. Some time passed and one cannot imagine his life without a computer. The further development of Information Technology, for instance, the Internet, provided mankind with new tools of teaching. Some people believe with the further growth of computer use the role of teachers will disappear. Others believe there is even greater responsibility for teachers now.

It looks almost OK, just a few notes:
1. People had had a dream -> "had a dream" is enough.
2. routine and day-to-day together are too much. Choose one you like more and use it.
3. Use either IT or information technology - in non-IT context latter is better.
4. "Tools of teaching" -> "Tools for teaching"
5. Teachers can disappear, their role is unlikely.
6. "there is even greater responsibility for teachers"->"responsibility of teachers wil grow".


Let us examine a situation, when computers replace teachers. In such a case there will be a great demand for prorammers and analytics to create thousands of various programs simulating various situations and case studies for students. Not meantioning it is quite difficult to observe each possible issue, we are still in need of tutors who and training coordinators who will be developing that software.

This paragraph is not bad too, but there is some strange stuff here as well:

1. prorammers -> programmers (I know it was just a typo... )
2. meantioning -> mentioning (typo or...?)
3. observe -> cover or evaluate are better choices in this context
4. each possible issue -> every possible issue (each is normally used with human beings only)
4. "we are still in need of tutors who and": "who" got here by mistake I hope
5. Not a grammar error, but tutors and training coordinator normally never mess with software development - which is good, on my mind.


Now let us try to combine these two great achievements of the human race - solid teaching experience and new technology opportunities. We are looking at an example of Finland educational system, which is considered to be one of the best practices in the world. Children are taught to look for information, critically think with the help of Information Technology. Those who live in remote villages can take part in the education process by means of distance learning.

In the conclusion, I would like to state that teachers will play even greater role in the learning process in future. A combination of a wise teacher and computer technology will be for the benefit of the whole society.

No major comments, here, though "We are looking at an example" can be change to "Take as an example the Finland ..."


PS basically, I do not like how it is writen I just do not like writing essays

Neither I do, that is why decided to review your one instead of writing my own.

The last not but least note:

Do not trust my judgement above too much, I am just another Russian out there and can be wrong like everyone else.

I will be happy to have any feedback from the author as well as from other posters.

Good luck!!!

P.S. I also promise to post here my own masterpiece when I manage to write one during my preparation for IELTS exam. Then you all will have a chance to pay back to me .
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Старый 23.11.2004, 18:48   #77 (permalink)
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here we go with... an essay!

[b]Nowadays we use computers in schools so freaquent ...
freaquent -> frequent Nice word, though.
Yup! Funny word, almost like Freakwent (bla-bla-bla).
Besides, isn't it supposed to be "so frequently" (adverb not adjective) ?
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Старый 23.11.2004, 18:55   #78 (permalink)
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Neither I do, that is why decided to review your one instead of writing my own.
Oh, man, it's a bit incorrect I mean it is "Neither do I" not how you put it



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Сообщение от hukilai

The last not but least note:
The last BUT not THE least note
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Старый 25.11.2004, 06:49   #79 (permalink)

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I have never ever seen anyone using "beforehand". It does not sound correctly to me. "Thanks in advance" is pretty informal. I would not use it writing to the "serious" organisations such as government agencies. For them I would use "Thank you very much in advance". If you are asking anything from vendor such as service provider, then "Thanks in advance" is all right.
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Старый 25.11.2004, 22:55   #80 (permalink)
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I have never ever seen anyone using "beforehand".
Agree...
Or you can write `Thank you in advance for your kind cooperation.`
My favorite
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Старый 30.11.2004, 13:42   #81 (permalink)

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HAWKDK

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Neither I do, that is why decided to review your one instead of writing my own.
Oh, man, it's a bit incorrect I mean it is "Neither do I" not how you put it



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Сообщение от hukilai

The last not but least note:

The last BUT not THE least note
"Neither I do" is OK, trust me

You will be suprised, man, but "the last but not least" is as good as "the last but not the least".

Your turn now.
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Старый 27.12.2004, 22:22   #82 (permalink)
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Hi!
Now i'm doing my pre-intermediate course, but after it, i'm thinking of studing English in London.
I need a piece of advice.
thanx.
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Старый 16.01.2006, 19:54   #83 (permalink)
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Hi!
Now i'm doing my pre-intermediate course, but after it, i'm thinking of studing English in London.
I need a piece of advice.
thanx.
I think you should to contunue course to intermediate or upper and more cheapper English courses is on the Malta. There you can prepare for IELTS.
Iam learning English on intermediate level and after then I would like to contunue study in Malta. For example, 2 weeks course cost about 500-600 $ and total cost with accommodation and flight with return tickets about 700-800$ maybe less.
you can see my English isn't well but i really want be better.
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Старый 28.01.2006, 17:23   #84 (permalink)
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I've renewed the topic. It seems to me that it'll be interesting for users.
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Старый 31.01.2006, 19:51   #85 (permalink)

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Hi!

I read this topic and I think that it very good idea to speak in English only. We can increse our English laguage ability by the talking here. At least I hope we'll try!
Just one request for more advanced speakers or native ones. Please check our speech and point to mistakes, even in this small message.

Thank's to all.
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Старый 31.01.2006, 20:43   #86 (permalink)
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...to speak in English
...to speak English. And actually we write English here.
We can increse our English laguage ability by the talking here.
We can make our English better writing messages here/
check our speech and point to mistakes
check our notes and correct our mistakes

Your turn to correct me, guys.

Mates, does "I have one request" sound good? It sounds like 'inquiry' for me.
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Старый 31.01.2006, 20:50   #87 (permalink)

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Mates, does "I have one request" sound good? It sounds like 'inquiry' for me.
Not really. Depends on the situation. Please clarify - who are you asking? What is the case?

More personal, less official:

"I would like to ask you for a favour"
"Could you please do me a favour"
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Старый 31.01.2006, 21:13   #88 (permalink)
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who are you asking? What is the case?
I'm talking (sorry, writing ) about Wanted's message.
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Старый 31.01.2006, 21:24   #89 (permalink)

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to Chyslyvchyk:

We can make our English better writing messages here

Please tell me - Did I wrong when I wrote 'We can increase our English language ability' or you meant that your sentence sounds more likely?
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Старый 31.01.2006, 21:38   #90 (permalink)

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who are you asking? What is the case?
I'm talking (sorry, writing ) about Wanted's message.
Oh, I see now, sorry

Well, this phrase looks like a calque from Russian to me. I'd write "And there's one thing I'd like to ask more advanced speakers for."

Though I'm not too much of an expert
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Старый 03.02.2006, 00:08   #91 (permalink)

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Did nobody be here at last some days?
Does nobody know English or this topic not interesting?

Chyslyvchyk, Nixie where're you?
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Старый 03.02.2006, 01:20   #92 (permalink)
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Chyslyvchyk, Nixie where're you?
Nixie is packing her baggage, I believe
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Старый 03.02.2006, 01:57   #93 (permalink)
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to Chyslyvchyk:

We can make our English better writing messages here

Please tell me - Did I wrong when I wrote 'We can increase our English language ability' or you meant that your sentence sounds more likely?
Sorry, I missed you message.
It seems to me that the word 'increase' doesn't fit. That sentence sounds better: 'We can improve our English language ability' or just 'We can improve our English' or 'We can enhance English language ability' (I googled last version ).

When you speak English you have to remember about words meaning. I would translate your version as 'Мы будем наращивать, разрастать способности говорить по-английски'. Sounds weird.
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Старый 03.02.2006, 04:28   #94 (permalink)

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Wow! Thanks a lot!

Sometimes I used not suitable words in sentences because my vocabulary is not as big as I want. I'm very glad that you correct me and I want you to ask do it in a future even if you'll be far from here. I mean in Australia.
In addition, I asked you about your immigration status. I read your story and I saw how unfairly your experience was assessed by ASPC. I want you to answer me, if you want, of course, about the end of this story. Did you appeal? Or did you apply the application to ASPC again?
If you want, please, answer me in English.
Thanks a lot!
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Старый 03.02.2006, 19:20   #95 (permalink)
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Sometimes I put improper words in sentences, because my vocabulary is not very large. I'm very glad that you correct me and I'd like to ask you to do this in the future, even after moving to Australia.

I asked you about your immigration status yesterday. I read your story and I saw how unfairly your experience was assessed by ASPC. Would you be so kind to write the end of this story? Did you appeal? Or did you lodge another application to ASPC? If you want, please, answer me in English.
Thanks in advance!
Well, you have to remember that you can't just translate sentence from Russian to English. The English sentences have their own order, structure and rules. Some Russian phrases sound odd and weird in English. For instance, you can't translate В этой местности в эпоху металла проживали племена, которые оставили о себе память в название гор, рек и поселений as In the metal epoch on this area lived the tribes, which have left the great amount of original names of mountains, rivers, lakes and settlements.

As for my process, I've lodged another application. Now I'm standing in line smoking bamboo and awaiting my turn.
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Старый 04.02.2006, 01:55   #96 (permalink)

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Well, you have to remember that you can't just translate sentence from Russian to English. The English sentences have their own order, structure and rules. Some Russian phrases sound odd and weird in English.
Yeah... You right certainly. I write English sentences such as you described above. So sad... I've lied myself thinking about my English language ability in writing. Certainly, I have to learn English much harder to passed IELTS.
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As for my process, I've lodged another application. Now I'm standing in line smoking bamboo and awaiting my turn.
What did you mean – ‘standing in line … and awaiting my turn’? As I could to know ASPC had failed your apply, because they had desired that your work experience had not suitable for immigration purposes. After that, you lodged your application again. As I know, ASPC must consider your application and take a decision – to give you visa or not to give (it’s not mine – Shakespeare said it long years ago). So … what your turn is consisting in?
P.S. 'Standing in line' – for instance, I would suppose that you’ll do nothing instead smoking bamboo. Am I right or wrong?
Thanks you for your tolerance.
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Старый 04.02.2006, 18:12   #97 (permalink)

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Don't you mind if I correct you?
[quote="WantedYeah... You right certainly(you are right/you're... I write English sentences such as(in a way) you described above. So sad... I've (I lied, Past Simle (not past perfect)) lied myself thinking about my English language ability in writing. Certainly, I have to learn (to study) English much harder to passed (to pass, Infinitive verb form) IELTS.

What did you mean – ‘standing in line … and awaiting (for) my turn’? (it means стою в очереди и курю бамбук )As I could to know (no part 'to' after modal verbs!!!) ASPC had failed your apply, because they had desired (maybe you mean "they decided"? don't think that was their desire... ) that your work experience had not ("is" not "had") suitable for immigration purposes. After that, you (have) lodged your application again. As I know, ASPC must consider your application and take a decision – to give ('grant' fits better ) you visa or not to give (it’s not mine – Shakespeare said it long years ago). So … what your turn is consisting in? ("turn" maybe consisting in something? what does that expression mean? )
P.S. 'Standing in line' – for instance, I would (no "would" here, я предполагаю) suppose that you’ll do nothing instead (of) smoking bamboo. Am I right or wrong?
Thanks ("thanks to you" or "thank you") you for your tolerance.[/quote]

I didn't mean to hurt you with such quantity of mistakes, just want to say you'd better have individual training in English, IMHO
Thanks in advance to that person who will correct me too
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Старый 04.02.2006, 18:32   #98 (permalink)
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What do you mean – ‘standing in line … and awaiting my turn’? As I know ASPC refused your application, because they considered your work experience not enough for immigration purposes. After that you lodged your application again. As I know, ASPC must assess your application and take a decision – to give you visa or not to give (it’s not mine – Shakespeare said this many years ago). So … what line and turn are you taking about?
P.S. 'Standing in line' means doing nothing but smoking bamboo. Am I right or wrong?
Thanks for your tolerance.
I lodged another application, it has another number, I'll have another officer (since my officer moved to another position). It's a new process. So I'm standing in line of other applicants.

P.S. Smoke bamboo means waiting impatiently.
P.P.S. It seems to me that's not good idea to turn the topic into my process discussion. Let's change the subject and find a good topic for discussion.
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Старый 04.02.2006, 20:01   #99 (permalink)

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Don't you mind if I correct you?
No, of cause not! If you had read my previous messages I asked more advanced users correct me every time if they would to, therefore your help is very useful to me. As you see I try not to repeat my previous mistakes from message to message. But sometimes it is very hard for me and nevertheless mistakes appears in my messages.
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I didn't mean to hurt you with such quantity of mistakes, just want to say you'd better have individual training in English, IMHO
I think the same!
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Старый 04.02.2006, 21:58   #100 (permalink)

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P.P.S. It seems to me that's not good idea to turn the topic into my process discussion. Let's change the subject and find a good topic for discussion.
Ok, ok! Let’s change the subject. I involved in this discussion because it was interesting for me to find out about the end of your story and possible consequences. Cause of my interest is growing from the same situation, which I have too. Oops… It seems like reiteration by me again…
And what do you like to talk about?
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