Всем привет. Покритикуйте пожалуйста. Отправлял это эссе Майку Уотти, он поставил мне общую 7.5, но зная о его к склонности к завышению, хотелось бы узнать мнение участников форума. Если честно, не верится, что все так радужно, т.к. он исправил 3 артикля и один предлог во всем эссе. За грамар он поставил 7, за остальные части 8. Привожу это эссе как и отправлял Майку.
#25. The development of technology has influenced the ways people interact with each other.
In what ways has the development of technology changed the types of relationships people have? Is this a positive or negative development?
In today's world, the ways of interaction between persons has changed dramatically. This essay suggests how technology changed relationships people have, and also discusses the reasons why these changes are positive.
The technology affected the relationships between people in many ways. First of all, many individuals prefer to use social media rather than meet each other off-line. Some scientists claim that this might lead to some social problems. For example, for some users it is quite difficult to integrate in society; however, they can easily communicate with other users in social networks. Secondly, the way people find new friends is different because of the invasion of the Internet. Today it is much easier to find a person, who shares the same interests and dreams, using World Wide Web.
There are two main reasons why the coming changes are positive. The main argument is that contemporary technology shrinks the distance between people. Modern means of communication let people stay in touch if they are in the different cities or even in different continents. For example, I have a great opportunity to speak everyday via Skype with a friend, who moved to the USA. Secondly, state-of-art technology can help not only to speak with each other but also share immediately photos or even videos. However, some decades ago people could wait for weeks for a letter from their relatives.
In conclusion, the development of technology has an undeniable effect on relationships between people because it might lead to psychological disorders or help to make friends. However, in spite of some problems, modern technology is a positive development because it could make relationships between people more tightened.
#25. The development of technology has influenced the ways people interact with each other.
In what ways has the development of technology changed the types of relationships people have? Is this a positive or negative development?
In today's world, the ways of interaction between persons has changed dramatically. This essay suggests how technology changed relationships people have, and also discusses the reasons why these changes are positive.
The technology affected the relationships between people in many ways. First of all, many individuals prefer to use social media rather than meet each other off-line. Some scientists claim that this might lead to some social problems. For example, for some users it is quite difficult to integrate in society; however, they can easily communicate with other users in social networks. Secondly, the way people find new friends is different because of the invasion of the Internet. Today it is much easier to find a person, who shares the same interests and dreams, using World Wide Web.
There are two main reasons why the coming changes are positive. The main argument is that contemporary technology shrinks the distance between people. Modern means of communication let people stay in touch if they are in the different cities or even in different continents. For example, I have a great opportunity to speak everyday via Skype with a friend, who moved to the USA. Secondly, state-of-art technology can help not only to speak with each other but also share immediately photos or even videos. However, some decades ago people could wait for weeks for a letter from their relatives.
In conclusion, the development of technology has an undeniable effect on relationships between people because it might lead to psychological disorders or help to make friends. However, in spite of some problems, modern technology is a positive development because it could make relationships between people more tightened.
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