My essay, проверьте, покритикуйте! Спасибо!

[Maimiti_Isabella]

Why do you think artists like writers, musicians and painters still have value in society? Discuss.

Так IELTS essay не формулируются. Не знаю откуда вы взяли это задание, но я так и не поняла что надо discuss и вообще что означает still have value

[HighHope]

Главная ваша проблема очень примитивна: нехватка английского.

Согласна, так и есть... Над чем и работаю. Уточните, пожалуйста, a lot of считаются не допустимыми в эссе? Я часто это встречаю в примерах эссе в высоким баллом? И что не так с there is/are? Спасибо за помощь!

[dazik]

Так IELTS essay не формулируются. Не знаю откуда вы взяли это задание, но я так и не поняла что надо discuss и вообще что означает still have value

I do not remember exactly where I took the task from, but the similar question is here:
IELTS Practice.Org » IELTS essay: Are artists valuable to society?
Do you think that artists like writers, musicians and painters are valuable to society? Discuss.

I see, probably "still" is redundant word here.
Actually, I skipped over this word when answered, without realising that it could have changed the meaning.

[Maimiti_Isabella]

Согласна, так и есть... Над чем и работаю. Уточните, пожалуйста, 1) a lot of считаются не допустимыми в эссе? Я часто это встречаю в примерах эссе в высоким баллом? И что не так с 2) there is/are? Спасибо за помощь!

1) недостаточно формально.
2) а. перебор! На такое коротенько эссе - 3 раза. Что показывает не совсем высокой уровень языка. И вообще, с точки зрения английского эта конструкция является очень простой. Практически примитивной. А вы - 3 раза!

и еще забыла упомянуть, словосочетание whole world в данном контесте не стоит употреблять.

the whole world have a lot of environmental problems --> has / experiences / faces / encounters (3d person singular) a wide range of environmental problems/concerns/issues

There are a lot of different methods which are successful using in some developed countries --> a variety of different methods and approaches is being used / employed / tried in some / certain developed countries.

[Maimiti_Isabella]

I do not remember exactly where I took the task from, but the similar question is here:
IELTS Practice.Org » IELTS essay: Are artists valuable to society?
Do you think that artists like writers, musicians and painters are valuable to society? Discuss.

So what? Who runs this site? Do they edit the topics before publishing them? How do you know that they are trustworthy?

I see, probably "still" is redundant word here.
Actually, I skipped over this word when answered, without realising that it could have changed the meaning.

Still or no still - I still don't understand what to discuss. There's no statement. Also, artists do not mean writers or musicians. This is poor English. Yes, you can refer to those as artistic or creative people but they are not artists. And generally, painters paint the walls (please note the world 'generally').

[HighHope]

Maimiti_Isabella, спасибо Вам огромное, весьма бесценные замечания. С данного момента буду держать под контролем "a lot of "! Как бы все это не ново, а вот с использованием провал, не знаю может это только моя проблема, но очень медлено перевожу слова из пассива в актив. Спасибо еще раз!

[Maimiti_Isabella]

... очень медлено перевожу слова из пассива в актив.

'Выучили' новые слова и выражения на определенную тему и тут же составьте список из 5-6 слов, проговорите их, 'поиграйтесь с предложениями в которых они употребляются и потом заставьте себя употребить их в эссе.

[dazik]

So what? Who runs this site? Do they edit the topics before publishing them? How do you know that they are trustworthy?
Honestly speaking, the question for me is also a bit of an awkward, untypical one.

Still or no still - I still don't understand what to discuss. There's no statement. Also, artists do not mean writers or musicians. This is poor English. Yes, you can refer to those as artistic or creative people but they are not artists. And generally, painters paint the walls (please note the world 'generally').

I was sure that "artist" was a general category for the people of artistic profession who perform, create or paint some artwork.

What I see in Oxford American dictionary
artist -
■ a person who produces paintings or drawings as a profession or hobby
■ a person who practices any of the various creative arts, such as a sculptor, novelist, poet, or filmmaker
■ a performer, such as a singer, actor, or dancer

Why I can't use them interchangeably? (I mean, artist or musician)? Is this an obsolete meaning?

[Maimiti_Isabella]

I was sure that "artist" was a general category for the people of artistic profession who perform, create or paint some artwork.

What I see in Oxford American dictionary
artist -
■ a person who produces paintings or drawings as a profession or hobby
■ a person who practices any of the various creative arts, such as a sculptor, novelist, poet, or filmmaker
■ a performer, such as a singer, actor, or dancer

Why I can't use them interchangeably? (I mean, artist or misician)? Is this an obsolete meaning?

yes, this meaning exists but the important thing is the context. I can say that Baryshnikov is an artist. I can say, '... artists like Baryshnikov'. But I will never say, '... artists like writers or musicians'.

And after I wrote this, I checked the same dictionary but limited my choices to BrE: Definition of artist in Oxford Dictionaries (British & World English)

[АнатолийI]

Dear all,
my question to you:
Can I use in my writting the letter R, which would be written as I show in the attached file?



I showed it to my known Englishmen and both of them didn't recognize this one.
However, Russian teachers use this way of writing as far as I know.

Please, advise- will be it bad for using in an essay?

[Maimiti_Isabella]

Dear all,
my question to you:
Can I use in my writting the letter R, which would be written as I show in the attached file?
[ATTACH]17378[/ATTACH]


I showed it to my known Englishmen and both of them didn't recognize this one.
However, Russian teachers use this way of writing as far as I know.

Please, advise- will be it bad for using in an essay?

Which one of those: the left or the right one? I guess the native speakers didn't recognise the left one. IELTS markers wouldn't have a problem with either of them. Don't forget, in addition to being IELTS examiners, they are professional ESOL / ELICOS teachers

[АнатолийI]

Which one of those: the left or the right one? I guess the native speakers didn't recognise the left one. IELTS markers wouldn't have a problem with either of them. Don't forget, in addition to being IELTS examiners, they are professional ESOL / ELICOS teachers

I meant the left one. and I was afraid that I could get a worse math because of my original R. It would be hardly for me to control and to correct every R. Now I quiet. Thank you!

[Maimiti_Isabella]

I meant the left one. and I was afraid that I could get a worse math because of my original R. It would be hardly for me to control and to correct every R. Now I quiet. Thank you!

А можно исправить?

hard = difficult

hardly - совершенно другое значение и употребление: hardly - Definition and pronunciation | Oxford Advanced Learners Dictionary at OxfordLearnersDictionaries.com

Что здесь означает quiet - не знаю вообще.

[dazik]

compalsory school education from the age of 5

Hello everybody! It would be great if anybody can chek this essay. Any criticism is more than welcome.

Education is recognized as vital to the future of any society in today's world. Governments throughout the world should make education compulsory for all children between the ages of 5 and 15. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Over the last century the controversial issue of obligatory education for 5 to 15 year olds has been a matter of heated debates for scholars and decision makers. While some countries support such educational scheme, I strongly disagree with that concept. The analysis of early schooling and the social outcomes of this educational model will prove the above stated position.

The first vital aspect to be mentioned is that a five-year-old child is not ready for schooling at such a young age. Being not developed physically and mentally, infants do not possess ability to concentrate and interact appropriately with peers. Thereby, the learning process is less productive and efficient that it could be if, for instance, pupils get enrolled in compulsory schools at a more mature age. Consequently, failures in learning can be a cause for negative attitude towards education and stress-related diseases.

Secondly, it should not be underestimated that early start means completion of school at a young age. One specific example giving ground for this statement is a high rate of competition on the modern labour market, which makes it complicated for the 15-year-olds to get jobs and to maintain themselves. Consequently, early school graduation leads to devastating social disadvantages for youngsters.

In conclusion, taking into account the reasons mentioned above, I am inclined to oppose the notion of obligatory schooling for children from 5 to 15. After analysing the subject, it has become apparent that it would be better for young learners to adopt age-range and to shift it higher that it matches children’s intellectual and physical faculties.

Thanks in advance for checking.

[Vyacheslav16]

Что здесь означает quiet - не знаю вообще.

Из контекста очевидно, что

Now I quiet.

означает "Теперь я спокоен".
Russian interference!